Blah Blah Blog
January 2023
I have a really old dog. He’s 15 years old and he’s been having bladder control issues and sometimes he can’t hold it long enough pisses in the house.
So we bought him these training pads. They go on the floor, so your dog can…well, go on the floor.
Before, he used to bark incessantly to let us know he needed to go out. Now he doesn’t make a sound. He just sneaks away and takes a piss or dump in the house when no one is looking. For anyone who thinks you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, guess again. We have taught our old dog to be discreet.
September 2022
Didn’t we fight a war to not give a shit about royalty?
As a reasonable human being, I’m sorry to see Queen Elizabeth go. I realize she meant a lot to the people of England and elsewhere. Now might be a good […]
August 2022
Everyone’s an infomercial host
I finally broke down and bought a pair of Birkenstocks after resisting for decades. I’ve only had them a couple days and the left one is rubbing the top of […]
State of standup
I’ve been watching a bunch of standup clips on YouTube and Instagram. Most of them involuntarily because they’re injected into my feed. Either the platform algorithms are working overtime, or […]
How about advertising less?
In what I assume is a cost-cutting move, GEICO is closing all its offices in California. I’m no accountant or financial whiz, but if I were GEICO and trying to […]
July 2022
In news this week, the McRib of frozen treats, the Choco Taco, has been discontinued by the Klondike company. I didn’t realize this was a real thing. I just thought “Choco Taco” was slang for an STD.
…and yes, if you go to Urban Dictionary, there are several different uses of the term.
June 2022
Boomers
I’m so tired of hearing Baby Boomers call everyone “snowflakes.” I’m especially tired of hearing them shit on Gen-Z and Millennials. When they bitch about that generation, I like to […]
I love how Americans think everywhere else in the world is so much more dangerous. We went to Italy and everyone was saying you better be careful because they’ll pick your pockets there. It’s pretty bad. Or France, they warned me about the gypsies in the Left Bank, they’re always running some kind of scam.
Meanwhile, back at home, you kids can’t go to school. Old people can’t go to grocery stores without worrying about getting shot.
Generational Bias
Last week would have been my Grandpa’s 118th birthday had he not passed away in 1997. He managed to have a long and interesting life. He was born in 1904. […]
Just like his cars, Tesla CEO believes his employees should spend more time in the shop.